I have always been at odds with this month. My birthday is in January but not being a cold weather fan and it being the beginning of Winter's depth I find myself less active and waiting for time to pass. But this January has been a month of unimaginable tragedy and enlightenment.
The loss of my brother, sister in law and niece reduced my life to it's basic need. To find comfort in family and friends, to work through pain and sorrow, to rebuild who I am, find what is truly important and to never let time just pass.
The enlightenment I have found can only be described as an Energy Epiphany where I felt the strength of my Brother Jon and learned what to focus on.
The easiest way to explain this is to say that I did not find god but found the power that is in us all, a collective energy that connects every living thing. Don't worry though, I'm not running off to join a cult because this feeling is an individual awakening and can only be realized by looking deep within yourself and how you relate to this existence.
Something else I've come to realize is that there are cowards that live among us and will occasionally cross paths with the righteous and being the dregs of society that they are will not leave us out of their lives but instead include us in the misery they have created for themselves. The one that has crossed my family's path will now have to deal with the consequence of his actions. But our family is strong and our resolve to come out of this has made us stronger. We are a family with many friends that will help us deal with this psychopath. He has taken something dear from us and I am prepared to take everything away from him. It will not be swift but it will be total.
Now life is slowly returning to what it should be and will once again be filled with the happiness I get from it. Soon Spring will warm the earth and the rebirth of my soul will be complete, Life truly springs eternal.
The loss of my brother, sister in law and niece reduced my life to it's basic need. To find comfort in family and friends, to work through pain and sorrow, to rebuild who I am, find what is truly important and to never let time just pass.
The enlightenment I have found can only be described as an Energy Epiphany where I felt the strength of my Brother Jon and learned what to focus on.
The easiest way to explain this is to say that I did not find god but found the power that is in us all, a collective energy that connects every living thing. Don't worry though, I'm not running off to join a cult because this feeling is an individual awakening and can only be realized by looking deep within yourself and how you relate to this existence.
Something else I've come to realize is that there are cowards that live among us and will occasionally cross paths with the righteous and being the dregs of society that they are will not leave us out of their lives but instead include us in the misery they have created for themselves. The one that has crossed my family's path will now have to deal with the consequence of his actions. But our family is strong and our resolve to come out of this has made us stronger. We are a family with many friends that will help us deal with this psychopath. He has taken something dear from us and I am prepared to take everything away from him. It will not be swift but it will be total.
Now life is slowly returning to what it should be and will once again be filled with the happiness I get from it. Soon Spring will warm the earth and the rebirth of my soul will be complete, Life truly springs eternal.
3 comments:
I try so hard to forgive.. I want to, but sometimes it just seems impossible. Like my friend Big Dave used to tell me 'fake it till you make it'.
Unkaholic, I don't have the words to describe the awesomeness of this post.
I'm late to this, but I'm glad you're okay.
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